can u get pink eye on your cock?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize