but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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