That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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