She's JV to your varsity
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
