Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
