New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
