yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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