Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I want her autograph on my taint
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Randomize