Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
