I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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