My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
