the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
the liver wants what the liver wants
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
