Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
