Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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