I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
