he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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