Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
