why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I want to be your penis for a week.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize
