Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize