he wants to bone in the snuggie
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
