First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
