That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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