Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
