you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
no you cant smoke seaweed
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize