just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
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