Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Randomize
