doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
