glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
She made me pour olive oil on her.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
