he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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