I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
