the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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