I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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