I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
You're completely useless in the revolution.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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