Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
