Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Sorry my hands just texted you
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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