you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
