You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
