Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.

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(310): View more from California

we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.

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(336): View more from North Carolina

You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?

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(786): View more from Florida

It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...

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(864): View more from South Carolina

turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy

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(540): View more from Virginia

'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"

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(714): View more from California

She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?

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(727): View more from Florida

She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.

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(435): View more from Utah

When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.

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