There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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