Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Randomize
