He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
