I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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