if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I had to cum in my sink.
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