How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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