guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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