Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
