you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
