a queef is a wish your heart makes.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
