I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Randomize
