There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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