Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I just had sex on a roof
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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