So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize