i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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